Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Truthful Tuesday

I always get a little offended when my mommy friends think I can't relate to stuff with their kids because I don't have human kids. But hello? I have HORSES. My kids weigh 1350 lbs each, will never actually learn to make themselves dinner, and easily rival any human kid in suicide attempts on a given day. EASILY. And you want to talk about destructive? Look what Jamp did to his stall this weekend:
It's a good thing Badger doesn't live with us because he would be next to Jampy, and this is what his stall looks like:
Kids.... Now I'm sure you're wondering how this happened. It doesn't appear that he was cast as there aren't any hoof prints and this is awfully high up for a cast horse. I think he was just a little overzealous in his itching. Horses...
It's not just destruction either. You've probably heard moms talk about the poopsplosion? Sometimes referred to as a blow out? No? It's when the baby poops through his or her diaper all the way up the back, and probably out the sides. It's pretty disgusting. Not gonna lie, definitely don't envy moms when THAT happens. Well... Horses can do it too. Only it's a MUCH larger scale. And they don't wear diapers.
Rio has been known in his golden years to have some tummy troubles of the loose poo variety. I'm not really sure if it's due to his medications or what exactly, but he has periods of time where his poo is ploppy. As of late, he's been making lovely little poo ball piles. It's been great because he's also not pooping all over his tail and legs. Until Sunday. OMG. You guys. I had him out on the crossties after doing a little "work" (that's a loose term, we'll discuss tomorrow). He was a little gassy, but that's not weird. He's a horse. They fart. Well. Next thing I know he's shooting poo out his butt like nothing I've ever witnessed. It was nasty you guys. There was poop spray on his blanket that was on the floor (NOT near his bum). There was poop spray on his legs. There was poop spray on ME. And omg you guys... His TAIL:
It was nasty. NASSSS TY. Of course I immediately brought him into the wash stall and washed that nastiness away. Poor guy. Obviously I was also concerned about him, because poo like this is not normal, even for him. But he was completely unperturbed by the entire thing. Mugging me for cookies and trying to figure out what the panic was about. Thankfully, his poo has been more or less normal since. Not sure what brought that on, but I guess I'm glad he got it out?
But you guys. It's going to be awhile before my barn floor recovers. I tried scrubbing with some soap and brush, all Cinderella style:
But\, uh... that's gonna leave a mark for awhile.
Do you ever feel like the mommy's out there roll their eyes at you if you try to compare your experiences with horses to theirs with their kids? Do you have both and want to chime in? Thoughts on explosive poop?


  1. Stampede likes to sit on his stall walls sometimes so the far end that has my grooming bay on the other side is bowing out. Evidently even 12' by 24' stall is just not enough space.
    Omg that poo was extreme! P has a bit of loose poo in the winter I think from the lack of short stem fiber and old age. I just got his teeth done to see if that helps any and if not I will be going in search of some short stem source that's not hay pellets or cubes because he loves to choke on things like that due to piginess.
    I still prefer horses (and dogs, etc) to kids.

    1. Oh that's an interesting thought. For Rio, he's been eating the same load of hay and the same brand/type of chopped hay all along, so probably not his issue. But something to think about! I'm with you, definitely prefer four legged children for my household!

  2. Omg, the little Morgan at my barn had a random explosive poop jet stream one day last summer out of nowhere on the crossties. It was the most epic and disgusting thing I've ever seen. Even he seemed stunned by it. It hadn't happened before and hasn't happened since. Boys will be poop shooting boys sometimes I guess. :P

  3. OMG explosive horse poop... I will never be the same. GROSS