Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Truthful Tuesday: the one with the green eyed monster

I think I've been handling this not showing thing fairly well for the last almost two years. I'm supportive of my showing friends. I look forward to seeing their Facebook posts and reading their horse show recaps. I've been doing some braiding. I've been to horse shows to spectate. But you guys. I'm getting jealous. I think I've reached my not showing threshold.
I miss all of this SO MUCH:
Cosmo, low a/o jumpers Sugar Bush 2001

Just Humour Me, junior hunters, Devon, 1997

Jamp high adult jumpers, VSF 2011
Ontario, Low A/O jumpers, Saratoga, 2005?

Jamp A/O hunters, Saratoga 2013

Ontario, Adult Hunters, VSF 2011
I mentioned last week about the junior getting to ride my trainer's extra horse. I'm gonna be honest with you guys... I was REALLY jealous and maybe a little hurt that my trainer didn't offer me that ride. My trainer has a small business. She buys young horses, gets them to the grand prix level and sells them. She here and there has a client, but boarders and client horses aren't really her thing. So I'm her only customer right now. And for that ride to go to some other kid was really hard for me to see. Especially since I haven't shown in so long. All that said, I know this kid really well. She's an awesome kid, and this opportunity is HUGE for her. So I'm crazy happy for her. I really am. Even if I am jealous.

I've never been the best rider out there. But I've had some really special horses. And with them, I was lucky enough to achieve a fair amount of success. And I miss it terribly. I have people tell me all the time, lease something! Get back in the ring! Just go do it! Just go show Badger!

But it's not that easy is it? Yes, I could lease something and go show. But I'm not all that confident on a loaner horse. I like to walk into that show ring knowing I should be there and that I'm competitive. Plus, I am currently supporting four horses. One of which is on full training board. So that doesn't leave me with money to lease and horse show a fifth horse.

So what do I do? Well. I do have plans. But they're all very conditional. My current plan is to find a kid to lease Jampy for a year or two and do the 2'6". I think that's where he'll stay sound, and he's more than capable of jumping around that height for a year or so. I want him back when he's ready to retire. I want to make sure he's in the right place at that point in his life. He's not there yet though!

I need to find a home for Romey. He's a challenge for me, and due to his mechanical unsoundness, he'll never be my show horse. No matter how broke he gets, he'll never be able to compete in the hunter ring. I'm having a hard time digging down deep to find my brave and get him trained, knowing that it will never be for what I want to do with him. I'm sure there's a human out there for him, but I'm not really sure where to find that person. I will make sure to do right by him, but I really need to find him a home that's not with me. It may be selfish, but the time and money I'm putting into him, are not bringing me joy. And it's a lot of time and money. (If any of you out there in blogland have suggestions or an interest in him, please comment below or shoot me an email!)

Badger's plans aren't so black and white. He's everything I want in a hunter, minus the fact that I haven't really figured him out yet. I have kind of a wait and see approach for him. He is available for sale, but not at a discount. He'll either be sold or he'll become my show horse. No idea which will happen or when. But that's his plan!

Obviously, Rio has a home with me forever whether it's as a riding horse or a pasture pet, or whatever else he decides he wants to do.

So that leaves me here, a little green with envy, watching all the showing happening all around me. I'm hoping that by next season I will have placed Romey somewhere, gotten Jampy a temporary kid, and will have a new show horse in the barn. Until then, Jampy and I are plugging along, trying to maybe get to a one day show or something.

While I'm feeling a little green eyed these days, I still appreciate all I'm lucky to have. First and foremost I will do right by my herd. They've done their best for me and I owe them that.

Have you ever felt a little left behind while everyone around you is doing what you wish you could? How did you find ways to push the envy aside? 

14 comments:

  1. I feel your pain. Breeding Tia has come to a crashing halt, and not in a good way. The owners of the barn next to mine just had a mare foal and they were complaining that it was a liver chestnut filly when they wanted a bay tobiano colt. She went on about how they didn't want another mare. I'm sitting here like I just want a foal!! I don't care the color or gender, I just want it.

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    1. That's the worst isn't it?! Rubbing salt in the wound. I hope things work out with breeding Tia.

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  2. I don't blame you for being bummed that you're spending all this money and time on horses, but not being able to show right now. It sounds like you have a good plan in place for everything, and it's just a matter of more patience until those plans pan out!

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    1. I think you're 100% right. Now that I've vented about, I feel a little bit of patience coming back.

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  3. I was wondering why you don't show Badger. He's so cute! I know what you mean though I spent most of last season out and I'm not even riding at shows this year, so jealous!

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    1. Badger is so cute! I don't really get to ride him so I haven't gotten to know him. He's a much more forward ride than I'm used to and I get a little intimidated by him. Hopefully trainer and I can work something out so I can get on him more often.

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  4. Sounds like a good plan. Best of luck finding the right niche for everyone.

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    1. Thanks! We'll see how it goes... You know how the best laid plans often go!

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  5. They envy monster is very unruly and ragey I find.. But hey, at least you figured out a plan to help you get back to it.

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    1. He always shows up uninvited! I think it's healthy though. Gives you something to work toward right?

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  6. "Have you ever felt a little left behind while everyone around you is doing what you wish you could?"
    Everyday, all the time. But I kind made the decision to take on Nilla instead of pursuing any sort of actual success in the show world. Doesn't mean it's not hard to watch others having fun. I thought Badger was going to be our show horse?

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    1. Nilla is totally worth it. She's the coolest!
      I'm hoping he will be. But so far, we aren't a great match together.

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  7. This is one of the hardest things in life: waiting your turn for some good fortune. But you're doing all the right things: planning, working hard and recognizing the envy within yourself. I have every faith that things will get on track for you soon!!

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    1. Thank you! Things usually work out in the end. It's just trying to be patient while you get there!

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